grouchy me

i think this was probably the first i ever had a bad day at work. it was the first time that jerkship at the office became a reality (i still don't think of them as jerks -- yet. i mean, i don't think they meant to piss me off. but they did. eek. crabby, grouchy Ish. tsk tsk.)

might as well. there's about a million YM status-es i can use when these days come:


Conclusion: the place where you got tired of thinking.

Out of Body. Back in Five Minutes.

I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

Program halted -- Hit any user to continue.

I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

If only everything came with pull-down menus and online help.

Mental backup in progress! Do Not Disturb! I Am NOT Asleep!

THINK -- it gives you something to do while the computer is down.

-----------------------

it's beginning to pour. it figures.

geek with a cause

To those who actually want to make use of their time, you might want to check this out:

UN Online Volunteering -- http://www.onlinevolunteering.org

Geekcorps -- www.geekcorps.org

rainy monday and grad school thoughts

yeah, i'm sure your day was pretty interesting too, but so was mine.

monday usually means showing up at the office a little before 8 am. today's suspension of work was annouced a little after 9 am.

ISH was at WORK.
WORK was SUSPENDED.
SUSPENDED = SINE.

Therefore:

ISH ---> SINE!

(of course, this was totally high school mentality, but that realization came when we were already halfway towards Liz's car, so what the heck.)

we watched Lady in the Water. you HAVE to watch this. and m. night --- dude, is it me or is that cameo looking more and more like a career?

during the ride home, that inevitable wave of guilt came over (conveniently right after the movie, of course). as soon as i got home, i changed into bum clothes, set up my laptop and opened the Service Desk to say hi to the issues awaiting. they weren't that many; apparently they also appreciate a good stay-in-and-bum day too.

i took the time to surf everything that i still haven't the guts to surf during work. no, not porn, you pervert. games, google jobs (whoops), and grad school. i got this sudden urge to plot for the future (which was rare). i narrowed down the good grad schools for computer science studies --- Stanford, MIT, Carnegie Mellon and Berkeley (dammit, these names scare me to death). i came across some good scholarships too. what i didn't expect to come across was some good tips:

- Graduate school is all about research. Training about research. Papers, papers, papers. If you can't stomach any more research, SCOOT. Maybe it's just not for you.
- An MS or PhD is for obsessive people, people who get more excited about digging deeper than actually having a job.
- Also ask yourself, what's after grad school? Probably teaching, or even more research work. If you can't stomach that, then SCOOT. Cmon now, I gave you a second chance.
- Graduate school's all about depth, not breadth.

I nailed the first four - I'm obsessive about details and unanswered questions, teaching college brats could be cool, and I hell do want to meet other obsessive weirdos like me. But one essential question left me stumped:

WHY DO I WANT A PHD?

The lady who wrote the tips said that it was imperative that this question be answered. Since I very well took her other tips to heart, I can't just ignore this one. Honestly, I don't have an answer. Yet.

Here's to hoping that 'yet' has a purpose.

flashback

back in high school, we had this Trig professor, Sir Melo. He wasn't really your dreamy wow-pare-dapat-nag-artista-ka-na-lang guy. He didn't even try extra hard to make your heart skip a beat. He was just this laid-back, witty, yeah-my-day-sucks-too-pero-kebs-lang kind of guy. i remember how our class made him lose his cool one day (which wasn't often) when we hid his chalk. now, i think he married one of our English teachers. he was perfectly normal. perfectly flawed. perfectly cool. perfect.

i don't even know why i thought of him today, but i want my own sir melo. no, not sir melo himself. nah, i want my own one.

critical

i solved my first critical ticket today. yey me. although it wasn't really that much of a feat --- just needed to bounce an application (e.g. stop and restart the container -- as i always say, the comp sci solution to everything).

it's funny how relative it is, what 'Critical' means to different people. an employee about to be late for a report. the signs of a bulge in a socialite's tummy. a pimple on the teenager's nose. lost tsinelas.

disturbingly blank

nothing really sends my head spinning more than that morning walk at the underpass from the Enterprise to Insular. a thousand blank faces -- yuppies, vendors, bosses, transients -- greet me everyday as they scurry off to their cubicles. hiya, rat race. is it silly that it bothers me that it's a thousand faces i don't know?

i want

everything that we do should be done for selfish reasons. wanting to be famous. wanting to be appreciated. wanting to save the world. different reasons, same drive. I WANT.

it's the only way to be sure that what we do is real. to do with passion and utter stubbornness. it's the only way everything ought to be done.

escapism

thank God for StumbleUpon, or else I would have lost my mind. it's the perfect i-don't-care-if-hell-breaks-loose-if-i-don't-solve-this-issue breakaway.

http://www.dumb.com/dumbcriminals.htm - i feel so much assured now. hehe.

http://www.geekologie.com - my favorite geek nook as of the moment. i love the swiss knife couch.

http://www.nostalgiacentral.com/features/20moviethings.htm - apparently, i wasn't the only one who noticed.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_problems_solved_by_MacGyver - finally! haven't done reading them all though. :)

c'mon, spank me

i'm a sinner. yes i am.

i have a new crush. he's sort of this new celebrity in town. charming and funny, he's at least 5"11 (+1000 pogi points!). he's also cute, in a professor-in-powerpuff-girls sort of way.

we had him over for lunch, and it nulled my other doubts. this guy is smart -- no, witty.

he's also a man of the cloth.

sheesh. it's fun to have a new crush, but i'm up against God, i know better than to push my luck.

God, bati tayo ha? haha. :p